Why I will never get a full Brazilian wax … ever again

Because it hurt like a mutha. The end.

Shortest blog post EVER.

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Sure, I could tell you embarrassing details about my first AND last Brazilian wax, which happened last summer. Is that what you want? You want me to relive it by telling you:

• the sweet girl at the front counter (you know who you are and I bet you’re reading this!) knew this was my first time and told me it really wasn’t going to be bad at all. I found out after the fact that she’s never had a waxing of the bikini bizkit, so she was just telling me what it took to get me to drop my panties!
• the waxologist was very professional, funny and is considered to be the best at this in the city, but none of that made a damn difference.
• I actually believed her when she told me that once she got below the labia, it wouldn’t hurt near as much … she was a LIAR!! And I told her so.
• instead of crying or screaming, I just started laughing uncontrollably and loudly. I’m pretty sure the rest of the salon enjoyed that.

In summary, the cost (I felt the need to leave a large tip because we’d been so intimate) to benefit (grew back too soon) to pain (seriously) ratio means I will never get a full Brazilian wax again. And it has nothing to do with being banned from that salon.